A
I look in the mirror and i see abomination. I took a selfie and upon looking at it got severe depression. I used to have that from time to time but went back to cope mode with games or the internet but this one has lingered for weeks now. Its not just that it was super ugly but also that it looked disgusting af. I cant cope with the fact that ppl have to look at that everytime they see me. how did i grow up to be this ugly. I know i had bad oral posture, shitty sleep poor diet and not great genetics but this still is just another level. I am at the verge of mental collapse. I cant stop thinking about this. there is even limb lengthening for height but nothing for the face? what is this cruelty oh universe... this is just torture on its own and todays shitty society makes it even more painful I just dont know what to do anymore, im sick of rotting in my apartment with no1 to talk to. I'd have done something about it when i was young had I known everything in my fcking life would depend on it infact i'd have put all my time, effort and resources into face alone. I wish my parents were wiser and realised the poor little boy's gon grow up miserable and jst fcking helped. I have no motivation to live, dont even bother to pour myself a glass of water when im thirsty. This is agony more than any physical pain. I had a oneitis many years ago and gave her disgust by just being close to her. I wish this was not my life. I wish this was no1's life. All my brothers that are in similar situation i can understand the pain you feel everyday and the hollowness inside you and I really wish this didn't happen to you. its unbearable accepting the fact that no female will ever look at me and see a human let alone desire sexually. I am done with all the copes. i have been rotting for years and idk if it is the right time but there is nothing else left.....
