SuicideFuel I only have myself

[bigantennaemay1]

I only have myself to comfort me. I have to hug myself to feel anything. I have to stroke my own hair when others, and life, have made me feel like complete, utterly worthless garbage. I've only ever had myself; nobody has ever been there for me, not once, my entire life. Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

And yet, I've been gaslighted so many times in my life, told how I should stop being so "self-hating." Wot?! "Self-hating"?! I don't hate myself! I have no problem with the way I am! It's the rest of the world that always seems to have a problem with me! I'm the only person that has ever not hated me!

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

I've asked myself so many times throughout my life, "what did I do to deserve this fate?" And then I would cradle myself in a corner of my room, and cry. I still do, sometimes, even to this day. I embraced myself, because else ever had. Nobody wanted to touch the weird, ugly, autistic kid.

 

[Fallenleaves]

Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

It's a sad fate for us born into a disadvantaged position because people bully us and no one helps, no one cares about the guy that's being bullied.

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

The world is a cruel place for some and heaven for others, it depends on what position in society you're born in. We, the unlucky ones have to cope with the difficulties of life ourselves, very brutal.

 

[Chingaquedito]

I only have myself to comfort me. I have to hug myself to feel anything. I have to stroke my own hair when others, and life, have made me feel like complete, utterly worthless garbage. I've only ever had myself; nobody has ever been there for me, not once, my entire life. Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

And yet, I've been gaslighted so many times in my life, told how I should stop being so "self-hating." Wot?! "Self-hating"?! I don't hate myself! I have no problem with the way I am! It's the rest of the world that always seems to have a problem with me! I'm the only person that has ever not hated me!

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

I've asked myself so many times throughout my life, "what did I do to deserve this fate?" And then I would cradle myself in a corner of my room, and cry. I still do, sometimes, even to this day. I embraced myself, because else ever had. Nobody wanted to touch the weird, ugly, autistic kid.

lack of affection is the most painful thing about inceldom, you can pay for sex whenever you want, but never for someone who legitimately cares about you

It's a sad fate for us born into a disadvantaged position because people bully us and no one helps, no one cares about the guy that's being bullied.

The world is a cruel place for some and heaven for others, it depends on what position in society you're born in. We, the unlucky ones have to cope with the difficulties of life ourselves, very brutal.

 

[Shrek]

I only have myself

Don't we all?

 

[I.N.C.E.L.S. Boss]

Go ez on yourself, brocel. At the end, we only have our health to carry us so take care of it.

I had a similar experience, all I have experienced is loneliness as people didn't view anything worthwhile in me that can benefit them.
When I was among deathnics, i was excluded. Among whites, excluded.

if I wasn't bullied, I would be alone. That is my reality.

I have found meaning in religion, Islam in particular. This reality is passing. 99% of the human population are destined for hell. Only 1% would remain in heaven.

 

[Sexless incel]

It’s just me, msyelf and i

Solo ride until I die

 

[manletogre]

I only have myself to comfort me. I have to hug myself to feel anything. I have to stroke my own hair when others, and life, have made me feel like complete, utterly worthless garbage. I've only ever had myself; nobody has ever been there for me, not once, my entire life. Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

And yet, I've been gaslighted so many times in my life, told how I should stop being so "self-hating." Wot?! "Self-hating"?! I don't hate myself! I have no problem with the way I am! It's the rest of the world that always seems to have a problem with me! I'm the only person that has ever not hated me!

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

I've asked myself so many times throughout my life, "what did I do to deserve this fate?" And then I would cradle myself in a corner of my room, and cry. I still do, sometimes, even to this day. I embraced myself, because else ever had. Nobody wanted to touch the weird, ugly, autistic kid.

Same

I sometimes talk randomly thinking there are others nearby, but no it’s just me in a room talking like mentally deranged autist

 

[manletogre]

When I was among deathnics, i was excluded. Among whites, excluded.

Exactly my experience, I was always rejected and pushed out of the group, no matter my own relatives,friends, deathnics/whites. I was forced into loneliness

I have found meaning in religion, Islam in particular. This reality is passing. 99% of the human population are destined for hell. Only 1% would remain in heaven.

Same here I was never exactly religious in my life, but I become more and more conservative and realist, i believe there are real satans on earth trying to destroy the society.

I might one day convert to Islam and be closer to allah, because I got nothing else

 

[LDARbeforeROPE]

Don't we all?

 

[bigantennaemay1]

It's a sad fate for us born into a disadvantaged position because people bully us and no one helps, no one cares about the guy that's being bullied.

No, instead, they viewed me as the "problem child." Seems to go hand-in-hand with that study that found that bully victims in the workplace are often perceived as the bullies, themselves.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Go ez on yourself, brocel. At the end, we only have our health to carry us so take care of it.

I'd rather it not carry me. I don't want much more of this.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Same

I sometimes talk randomly thinking there are others nearby, but no it’s just me in a room talking like mentally deranged autist

I am a mentally deranged autist, and do talk to myself all the fucking time. It's not like I have anyone else to talk to, so I resort to what's available.

 

[Fallenleaves]

No, instead, they viewed me as the "problem child." Seems to go hand-in-hand with that study that found that bully victims in the workplace are often perceived as the bullies, themselves.

Brutal statistics-pill

 

[manletogre]

I am a mentally deranged autist, and do talk to myself all the fucking time. It's not like I have anyone else to talk to, so I resort to what's available.

we are schizos

 

[Cope_Time]

Understandable, life is luck, you born unlucky you are done.
Being the "weird one" all the time is something that only other "weird ones" can understand, as a autist i get you, life was never easy on us.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

we are schizos

I'm a diagnosed aspie.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Brutal statistics-pill

All statistics are brutal.

 

[Emba]

Dogs can be huggy

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Dogs can be huggy

 

[Antisocialloner]

Relatable.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Relatable.

I'm sorry.

 

[Stopping@Nothing19]

everyone is in the same position when you peel back all the shallow relationships

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

everyone is in the same position when you peel back all the shallow relationships

I'm sorry.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

everyone is in the same position when you peel back all the shallow relationships

They get touch and sex. It's not the same: I'm completely and utterly deprived from essential human experiences that normies and stacies and chads still get, to varying degrees.

 

[Stopping@Nothing19]

They get touch and sex. It's not the same: I'm completely and utterly deprived from essential human experiences that normies and stacies and chads still get, to varying degrees.

completely agree brocel however, you need to realise how fickle all these relationships are and how they are all based on conditions, there is no unconditional love between two adults

 

[bigantennaemay1]

completely agree brocel however, you need to realise how fickle all these relationships are and how they are all based on conditions, there is no unconditional love between two adults

I never said love; I said "touch and sex".

 

[Stopping@Nothing19]

I never said love; I said "touch and sex".

pay for an escort in that case

 

[bigantennaemay1]

pay for an escort in that case

Can't afford it.

 

[Stopping@Nothing19]

Can't afford it.

that's your problem

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Take the monkpill and free urself from sexual desires

That sounds like delusion. I cannot embrace delusion; believe me, I've tried.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

It’s just me, msyelf and i

Solo ride until I die

That sounds like delusion. I cannot embrace delusion; believe me, I've tried.

 

[avoidthefoid]

I only have myself to comfort me. I have to hug myself to feel anything. I have to stroke my own hair when others, and life, have made me feel like complete, utterly worthless garbage. I've only ever had myself; nobody has ever been there for me, not once, my entire life. Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

And yet, I've been gaslighted so many times in my life, told how I should stop being so "self-hating." Wot?! "Self-hating"?! I don't hate myself! I have no problem with the way I am! It's the rest of the world that always seems to have a problem with me! I'm the only person that has ever not hated me!

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

I've asked myself so many times throughout my life, "what did I do to deserve this fate?" And then I would cradle myself in a corner of my room, and cry. I still do, sometimes, even to this day. I embraced myself, because else ever had. Nobody wanted to touch the weird, ugly, autistic kid.

that's exactly my situation.
are you me from a parallel reality or something?

 

[bigantennaemay1]

that's exactly my situation.
are you me from a parallel reality or something?

I sure hope not, because that would mean I live multiple lives. If you are, I hope you're me from a lifetime passed.

 

[avoidthefoid]

I sure hope not, because that would mean I live multiple lives. If you are, I hope you're me from a lifetime passed.

it's orge tbh tbh

 

[bigantennaemay1]

Same

Nowadays, I cradle a bottle of alcohol while I cry. Same shit, but at least I can make my head spin, which feels a little better.

 

[gangrenemax]

Nowadays, I cradle a bottle of alcohol while I cry. Same shit, but at least I can make my head spin, which feels a little better.

invest in sex doll https://starpery.com/products/, i don't have money currently I hug my pillow and place my laptop to the side and watch atk girlfriends porn. its depressing but a decent cope

 

[bigantennaemay1]

invest in sex doll https://starpery.com/products/, i don't have money currently I hug my pillow and place my laptop to the side and watch atk girlfriends porn. its depressing but a decent cope

I already have sex doll. It's like hugging/fucking a corpse.

 

[gangrenemax]

I already have sex doll. It's like hugging/fucking a corpse.

damn I was planning on getting one now I'm depressed lol

 

[Khanivore]

Mice elf

 

[bigantennaemay1]

damn I was planning on getting one now I'm depressed lol

It might work for some. I live at home with my father, which has also severely dampered my disposition toward the doll, as being stealthy with it is a giant pain in the ass.

But it will be cold to the touch (at least initially; the material picks up heat somewhat quickly), and it will be stiff and heavy, so it is hard to ignore its similarities to a corpse.

Disclaimer for refrigerator-IQ glowies and IT: I don't actually know first-hand what a corpse feels like, I just assume it's cold and stiff.

 

[Transcended Trucel]

I only have myself to comfort me. I have to hug myself to feel anything. I have to stroke my own hair when others, and life, have made me feel like complete, utterly worthless garbage. I've only ever had myself; nobody has ever been there for me, not once, my entire life. Nobody ever stood up for me, when my bullies were making my life hell; nobody ever bothered to find out what was making me so miserable, or to offer genuine help; nobody has ever cared about me, except me.

And yet, I've been gaslighted so many times in my life, told how I should stop being so "self-hating." Wot?! "Self-hating"?! I don't hate myself! I have no problem with the way I am! It's the rest of the world that always seems to have a problem with me! I'm the only person that has ever not hated me!

I'm the only one I ever had; I remember I used to turn inward when life became unbearable, because there was nowhere else to turn; no one else to turn to.

I've asked myself so many times throughout my life, "what did I do to deserve this fate?" And then I would cradle myself in a corner of my room, and cry. I still do, sometimes, even to this day. I embraced myself, because else ever had. Nobody wanted to touch the weird, ugly, autistic kid.

gigabrutal and relatable. As trucels we only have ourselves. There is no one else to back you up, there has never have been any one who backs you and there will never ever be anyone who backs you. This is why it is major key for trucels to meditation Maxx and read stoicism books. Life has never gotten easier for me no matter how much time passed. For trucels life never gets easier. We only get better dealing with problems.

 

[bigantennaemay1]

gigabrutal and relatable. As trucels we only have ourselves. There is no one else to back you up, there has never have been any one who backs you and there will never ever be anyone who backs you. This is why it is major key for trucels to meditation Maxx and read stoicism books. Life has never gotten easier for me no matter how much time passed. For trucels life never gets easier. We only get better dealing with problems.

We all have our own ways of dealing with the situation.

 

[Izayacel]

Relatable.