I went to the cinema and watched "A Minecraft Movie". I went alone because I have no friends nor girlfriend I can invite to watch the movie. Ngl, I felt jealous seeing couples and groups of friends at the cinema. I was by alone by myself. I also almost thought that I was gonna miss the first scenes because I was waiting in the line to buy snacks, and there were 2 foid employees attending which were slow. Luckily, I got to see the movie on time because ads at the cinema appeared while I was buying snacks.
Well here's the recap of the movie8DOn't read if you haven't watched the movie and you don't wanna get spoiled):
The movie starts with Steve as a child who wanted to go to a mine in a town Chuglass, Idaho. He never got to go to the mine as a child because there was this oldass miner who would tell him to go away. Steve grew up, had a boring life with a boring job(just like many incels here on .is, basically the boring life kikes want everyone in soyciety to live like). Steve got bored of his blackpilled life in the real world, and decided to go to the mine as an adult, and started mining with his pickaxe and found the orb of dominance which guided him to a portal where he got inside Minecraft. There Steve started a new life in the Minecraft, built some houses, and tamed a wolf which he called Dennis. One day Steve discovered the Nether after finding Nether ruins, and he got inside because his dog went there out of curiosity. There Steve met the piglins, and the foid piglin and ruler of the Nether, Malgosha. Malgosha wanted the steal the orb of dominance to destroy creativity in the overworld, but Steve made his dog Dennis escape from the Nether with the orb, and then from the overworld, Dennis came to the real world where the orb stays, and the portal to the real world closed. Steve was held as a prisoner in the Nether by the piglins for a long time as a sacrifice to save the world.
The then opening credits start, and we get to see Garrett who owns his game shop in the same town, Chuglass, where he holds memories of his past as a popular gamer who even made a million in a gaming tournment, and had his moment of fame. Now Garrett is broke, and received an eviction notice for his store. Garrett tries to find a way to make money, so he goes to an auction where they sell old stuff including of videogames, and he's told about a rare cube which Garrett thinks has a lot of worth. In the auction, among some Minecraft youtubers, Garrett is the one who gives the most money for the cube which is the orb, and he keeps it, but he feels scammed, and makes a mess on the auction because of his rage. Now Garrett is blackpilled about money.
Then we get to see Natalie driving his brother Henry to the town Chuglass, apparently, their mom died and her last wish was for Henry and Natalie to live in this town. There they meet the fatass nigger foid Dawn who works in home agency, and also taking care of animals, and she shows Henry and Natalie their new home. Henry then goes to Garrett's game shop, and becomes friends with Garrett. Henry then goes to a new school, where the oldass blonde foid viceprincipal Marlene welcomes him, and she also tells her about shit about her divorce which no one asked her(Classic post-wall foid who thinks she's still worthy of love).
There in class, he is on art class, and the art teacher tells them to draw a banana and orange as they see it, but Henry draws a banana with a rocket and is scolded by the teacher. 2 bullies mock Henry's drawing, and he tells them about his passion for rockets and that he knows how to build rockets. Henry builds a rocket holding a skeleton model in school, but a bully cut off a cable without anyone noticing, and that causes Henry's rocket to go in an uncontroled direction while flying which crashes where his sister Natalie was working. Due to this incident of the rocket, Henry is taken to the viceprincipal's office who nags him, and tells him to call his legal guardian which is his sister, since Henry didn't want his sister mad at him, he calls Garrett and pays him to pretend to be his uncle. Garrett picks up Henry from school, and we get a cringe scene of the foid viceprincipal flirting with Garrett.
Garrett takes Henry to his videogame shop, and there Garrett sees the orb Garrett bought. They combine the crystal and orb despite there being a note telling them not to do that, and that causes for the orb to vibrate, and the place where they are in starts shaking. The orb's vibrations pull Henry into a path which leads him to the mine where Steve found the orb. Meanwhile, Natalie arrives home from work, and she's worried she didn't find Henry at school and is not at home either. Natalie calls Dawn for help, and she tells him about what she heard Henry did in school with the rocket, and somehow Dawn has something to track Henry. Dawn tells Natalie that Henry is heading to an abandoned mine, and she takes Natalie on her car, so they can find Henry. There on the mine, Natalie and Dawn see Henry and Garrett heading to a portal. Natalie nags Henry, but at the same time, Henry is being pulled by the portal. Garrett, Natalie, and Dawn try to pull Henry away, from the portal, but the portal pulls the 4 of them instead.
Henry, Natalie, Garrett, and Dawn find themselves inside Minecraft, and they start walking around amazed for where they encounter themselves, and they start wandering around. Meanwhile in the Nether, because the orb came back into Minecraft, Malgosha can feel the presence of the orb in Minecraft, and she asks Steve still being held as a prisoner to go and get it for him, and she threatens to kill Dennis if he dares to go against her orders. Meanwhile, on the overworld, while the 4 characters are walking and exploring the place, a nitwit villager sees the portal where they came from and comes to the real world, and also Dennis who was in the real world gets inside the mine to go into the portal to get inside Minecraft again.
As the time passes, Natalie tells Henry to leave, but it suddenly becomes night in the overworld, and the 4 characters get attacked by spider jockeys. The 4 characters run, but Garrett gets lost from the group because he falls in a hole. Meanwhile, Henry, Natalie, and Dawn are running, and Henry accidentally hits a tree breaking a wood block. Henry then starts learning how to build, and he builds a base out of wood while they are being chased by zombies, but while Henry was building this base to protect the group, he drops the orb to the grass, and forgets about it. Meanwhile, Garrett escapes the hole he fell in, and then gets blown up by a creeper. Garrett then finds the base, and he picks up the orb from the glass, but while he was holding the orb, a skeleton shoots at him breaking the crystal of the orb which causes the portal to the real world to close. Henry then saves Garrett from the zombies, and the group's base gets attacked by zombies like if it were a zombie movie. Then suddenly, Steve finds the group's base and starts fighting against the zombies until the sunlight comes and the zombies get burned.
The group meets Steve, and Steve asks the group to give them the orb, but they refuse to give it to him since they don't trust him yet, and it's their way home. Steve seeing that the crystal of the orb is broken, he tells them that the only way they can go home is if they find another crystal which is in a woodland mansion which is dangerous to go to, so now because of this, the 4 characters are stuck in Minecraft. Steve then takes the group to Midport Village, and shows them the place and the villagers, we also get to see a tribute to Technoblade as a pig with a crown having a cameo. Steve then teaches Garrett and Henry how to craft, Garrett makes buckchuckets and Henry crafts a potato launcher with real life items. And they also make their plan to go to the woodland mansion.
Meanwhile, in the Nether, Magosha sends General Chungus with a piglin army with anti-zombification potions to go to the overworld to steal the orb from the characters. While the characters are at the village, the village gets attacked by piglins and ghasts. The characters start defending themselves, and some villagers get killed. Due to the attacks being all of sudden and the chaos, the boys get separated from the foids, and they agree to meet at woodland mansion. The boys go to a high place on the village, and there Steve gives Henry and Garrett electrowings, so they can fly, but he forgot to get some electrowings for himself, so he jumps into Garrett to holdhimself. While, Henry, Steve, and Garrett are flying, they get chased by ghasts and a baby piglin even jumps into Henry while he's flying. They manage to make the ghasts to explode, and after a while of flying, their electrowings get broken, and the 3 of them hold themselves together in the air while Steve does a MLG near pandas, so they can save themselves from the fall. Meanwhile in the Nether, General Chungus returns after failing to get the orb, and he gets killed by Malgosha, and Malgosha sends a giant piglin with another army of piglins to the overworld, so they can get her the orb.
Henry, Steve, and Garrett now have to go walking to the woodland mansion through some mountains, and they enter a mine of diamonds. But while being on the mine, they get chased by the giant piglin Magosha sent, and that giant piglin destroys everything around him. Henry, Steve, and Garrett run from the piglin, and they get into some minecarts to escape, but suddenly they get into a rail where there is no redstone torch to power them up, and they get surrounded by multiple creepers. Garrett has to push the minecarts to the rail where there is redstone, so they can go fast, and they manage to go fast against just moments before the giant piglin reached them. They finally get near the woodland mansion, and Henry gets angry at Garrett for only caring about diamonds and willing to give the orb to Steve, Garrett then talks about how blackpilled his finances are in the real world, and then gives Henry the orb after the argument. Steve then makes the plan, so they can get inside the woodland mansion.
Once they enter into the woodland mansion, Henry goes to the third floor running away from some illagers, and starts searching on multiple chests to find the crystal for the orb. Meanwhile, Steve and Garrett distract the illagers at the entrance by singing them a rap birthday song, but since they sing badly, the illagers get Garrett and Steve into a fighting ring, and they tie Steve, and make Garrett fight against a chicken jockey. Meanwhile, Henry finally found the crystal orb, but an enderman happens to be behind him, he tries closing his eyes, but in one moment Garrett looks at the enderman, and the enderman gives him a brutal blackpill hallucination which makes him see the people he knows telling him how worthless he is, the hallucination passes fast, and the enderman attacks him, but Henry manages to kill the enderman and get and ender pearl. He then breaks a block on the floor, and gets to where Steve and Garrett are fighting against the chicken jockey. They manage to beat the chicken jockey, and they escape the illagers leaving the woodland mansion.
While Henry, Steve, and Garrett were leaving the woodland mansion, they get attacked by the piglins and ghasts who destroy the bridge where they were running in. Malgosha with her powers steals the orb with the crystal from them, and goes away leaving her piglins and ghasts attacking them. Henry and Steve escape by getting into a platform being carried by a ghast, but Garrett stays distracting the piglins, and making them blow up with him on the bridge. Henry and Steve while flying with the ghasts get attacked, and they fall to the ground unconscious. Meanwhile, the foids Natalie and Dawn are running around killing zombies, and they find Dennis who guides them to Steve. Natalie and Dawn take Henry and Steve to a safe place on a mushroom house where Henry and Steve wake up.
Meanwhile, Malgosha takes over the overworld with a huge Nether portal and the orb which causes for the overworld to turn dark, and all monsters start attacking. Henry, Steve, Natalie, and Dawn organize their plan to defeat Malgosha and her piglins. They craft multiple iron golems, and they make a giant fast golem out of iron blocks and swiftness boots. The piglins attack the golems, and the golems start defending themselves. Dawn tames multiple dogs and explodes TNT to fight against monsters. Henry throws his ender pearl at the high point of the huge Nether portal where the orb is placed, but he fails to pick it up because he's short. A piglin shoots at Henry, and he ends up falling from a high place, but Garret appears out of nowhere controling a Ghast and he saves Henry from his fall. Steve then fights against Malgosha with his diamond armor, but his diamond chestplate gets broken. The orb gets removed from the high place, and the giant piglin grabs it, but the fast giant iron golem takes the orb away from him, and destroys the giant piglin. The dark suddenly disappears, and it's day again. Steve manages to defeat Malgosha, and Steve leaves Malgosha to agonize.
We then get the ending where Henry, Steve, Garrett, Natalie, Dawn, and Dennis go back to the real world once the portal is open, and there their lives become better. Garrett makes a videogame out of what they experienced in Minecraft and his finances recover, Dawn has her business working with animals, and Natalie creates self-defense classes using models of piglins. The movie then ends with them singing and dancing with multiple people at the game shop.
The credits play, and we see the nitwit villager with the oldass foid viceprincipal Marlene, they went on a date after she hit him with her car, and this part is so cringe on the movie. Marlene's ex-husband is Henry's art teacher, and he gets cucked by the nitwit villager who proposes marriage to this foid. The villager learned to speak English, and the foid learned to speak the villager's mumbling language.
On the post-credits scene, we get to see Steve going back to his home, and there he meets the new homeowner who is Alex, but we don't see Alex's face, only her back red hair. The voice of the foid who plays Alex was hot ngl.
And this is all the Minecraft movie.
Now my review:
The movie was mid, I thought it was gonna be something woke because of the nigger foids appearing, and because it's a movie directed by a kike, but I did become entertained by the movie. I forgot about my blackpilled life watching the movie. I liked the adventure they made on the movie, all the Minecraft references, the pink sheep was kind of weird on its design and sounds(also creepy scene on the movie: the pink sheep gets devoured by zombies, no joke). The explosions were epic, and the fight against Malgosha and the piglins was amazing too. One thing I did cringe to was the the oldass foid dating the villager, why do they have to add these cringe scenes? Just for this, I give the movie 3.5 stars.
Well here's the recap of the movie8DOn't read if you haven't watched the movie and you don't wanna get spoiled):
The movie starts with Steve as a child who wanted to go to a mine in a town Chuglass, Idaho. He never got to go to the mine as a child because there was this oldass miner who would tell him to go away. Steve grew up, had a boring life with a boring job(just like many incels here on .is, basically the boring life kikes want everyone in soyciety to live like). Steve got bored of his blackpilled life in the real world, and decided to go to the mine as an adult, and started mining with his pickaxe and found the orb of dominance which guided him to a portal where he got inside Minecraft. There Steve started a new life in the Minecraft, built some houses, and tamed a wolf which he called Dennis. One day Steve discovered the Nether after finding Nether ruins, and he got inside because his dog went there out of curiosity. There Steve met the piglins, and the foid piglin and ruler of the Nether, Malgosha. Malgosha wanted the steal the orb of dominance to destroy creativity in the overworld, but Steve made his dog Dennis escape from the Nether with the orb, and then from the overworld, Dennis came to the real world where the orb stays, and the portal to the real world closed. Steve was held as a prisoner in the Nether by the piglins for a long time as a sacrifice to save the world.
The then opening credits start, and we get to see Garrett who owns his game shop in the same town, Chuglass, where he holds memories of his past as a popular gamer who even made a million in a gaming tournment, and had his moment of fame. Now Garrett is broke, and received an eviction notice for his store. Garrett tries to find a way to make money, so he goes to an auction where they sell old stuff including of videogames, and he's told about a rare cube which Garrett thinks has a lot of worth. In the auction, among some Minecraft youtubers, Garrett is the one who gives the most money for the cube which is the orb, and he keeps it, but he feels scammed, and makes a mess on the auction because of his rage. Now Garrett is blackpilled about money.
Then we get to see Natalie driving his brother Henry to the town Chuglass, apparently, their mom died and her last wish was for Henry and Natalie to live in this town. There they meet the fatass nigger foid Dawn who works in home agency, and also taking care of animals, and she shows Henry and Natalie their new home. Henry then goes to Garrett's game shop, and becomes friends with Garrett. Henry then goes to a new school, where the oldass blonde foid viceprincipal Marlene welcomes him, and she also tells her about shit about her divorce which no one asked her(Classic post-wall foid who thinks she's still worthy of love).
There in class, he is on art class, and the art teacher tells them to draw a banana and orange as they see it, but Henry draws a banana with a rocket and is scolded by the teacher. 2 bullies mock Henry's drawing, and he tells them about his passion for rockets and that he knows how to build rockets. Henry builds a rocket holding a skeleton model in school, but a bully cut off a cable without anyone noticing, and that causes Henry's rocket to go in an uncontroled direction while flying which crashes where his sister Natalie was working. Due to this incident of the rocket, Henry is taken to the viceprincipal's office who nags him, and tells him to call his legal guardian which is his sister, since Henry didn't want his sister mad at him, he calls Garrett and pays him to pretend to be his uncle. Garrett picks up Henry from school, and we get a cringe scene of the foid viceprincipal flirting with Garrett.
Garrett takes Henry to his videogame shop, and there Garrett sees the orb Garrett bought. They combine the crystal and orb despite there being a note telling them not to do that, and that causes for the orb to vibrate, and the place where they are in starts shaking. The orb's vibrations pull Henry into a path which leads him to the mine where Steve found the orb. Meanwhile, Natalie arrives home from work, and she's worried she didn't find Henry at school and is not at home either. Natalie calls Dawn for help, and she tells him about what she heard Henry did in school with the rocket, and somehow Dawn has something to track Henry. Dawn tells Natalie that Henry is heading to an abandoned mine, and she takes Natalie on her car, so they can find Henry. There on the mine, Natalie and Dawn see Henry and Garrett heading to a portal. Natalie nags Henry, but at the same time, Henry is being pulled by the portal. Garrett, Natalie, and Dawn try to pull Henry away, from the portal, but the portal pulls the 4 of them instead.
Henry, Natalie, Garrett, and Dawn find themselves inside Minecraft, and they start walking around amazed for where they encounter themselves, and they start wandering around. Meanwhile in the Nether, because the orb came back into Minecraft, Malgosha can feel the presence of the orb in Minecraft, and she asks Steve still being held as a prisoner to go and get it for him, and she threatens to kill Dennis if he dares to go against her orders. Meanwhile, on the overworld, while the 4 characters are walking and exploring the place, a nitwit villager sees the portal where they came from and comes to the real world, and also Dennis who was in the real world gets inside the mine to go into the portal to get inside Minecraft again.
As the time passes, Natalie tells Henry to leave, but it suddenly becomes night in the overworld, and the 4 characters get attacked by spider jockeys. The 4 characters run, but Garrett gets lost from the group because he falls in a hole. Meanwhile, Henry, Natalie, and Dawn are running, and Henry accidentally hits a tree breaking a wood block. Henry then starts learning how to build, and he builds a base out of wood while they are being chased by zombies, but while Henry was building this base to protect the group, he drops the orb to the grass, and forgets about it. Meanwhile, Garrett escapes the hole he fell in, and then gets blown up by a creeper. Garrett then finds the base, and he picks up the orb from the glass, but while he was holding the orb, a skeleton shoots at him breaking the crystal of the orb which causes the portal to the real world to close. Henry then saves Garrett from the zombies, and the group's base gets attacked by zombies like if it were a zombie movie. Then suddenly, Steve finds the group's base and starts fighting against the zombies until the sunlight comes and the zombies get burned.
The group meets Steve, and Steve asks the group to give them the orb, but they refuse to give it to him since they don't trust him yet, and it's their way home. Steve seeing that the crystal of the orb is broken, he tells them that the only way they can go home is if they find another crystal which is in a woodland mansion which is dangerous to go to, so now because of this, the 4 characters are stuck in Minecraft. Steve then takes the group to Midport Village, and shows them the place and the villagers, we also get to see a tribute to Technoblade as a pig with a crown having a cameo. Steve then teaches Garrett and Henry how to craft, Garrett makes buckchuckets and Henry crafts a potato launcher with real life items. And they also make their plan to go to the woodland mansion.
Meanwhile, in the Nether, Magosha sends General Chungus with a piglin army with anti-zombification potions to go to the overworld to steal the orb from the characters. While the characters are at the village, the village gets attacked by piglins and ghasts. The characters start defending themselves, and some villagers get killed. Due to the attacks being all of sudden and the chaos, the boys get separated from the foids, and they agree to meet at woodland mansion. The boys go to a high place on the village, and there Steve gives Henry and Garrett electrowings, so they can fly, but he forgot to get some electrowings for himself, so he jumps into Garrett to holdhimself. While, Henry, Steve, and Garrett are flying, they get chased by ghasts and a baby piglin even jumps into Henry while he's flying. They manage to make the ghasts to explode, and after a while of flying, their electrowings get broken, and the 3 of them hold themselves together in the air while Steve does a MLG near pandas, so they can save themselves from the fall. Meanwhile in the Nether, General Chungus returns after failing to get the orb, and he gets killed by Malgosha, and Malgosha sends a giant piglin with another army of piglins to the overworld, so they can get her the orb.
Henry, Steve, and Garrett now have to go walking to the woodland mansion through some mountains, and they enter a mine of diamonds. But while being on the mine, they get chased by the giant piglin Magosha sent, and that giant piglin destroys everything around him. Henry, Steve, and Garrett run from the piglin, and they get into some minecarts to escape, but suddenly they get into a rail where there is no redstone torch to power them up, and they get surrounded by multiple creepers. Garrett has to push the minecarts to the rail where there is redstone, so they can go fast, and they manage to go fast against just moments before the giant piglin reached them. They finally get near the woodland mansion, and Henry gets angry at Garrett for only caring about diamonds and willing to give the orb to Steve, Garrett then talks about how blackpilled his finances are in the real world, and then gives Henry the orb after the argument. Steve then makes the plan, so they can get inside the woodland mansion.
Once they enter into the woodland mansion, Henry goes to the third floor running away from some illagers, and starts searching on multiple chests to find the crystal for the orb. Meanwhile, Steve and Garrett distract the illagers at the entrance by singing them a rap birthday song, but since they sing badly, the illagers get Garrett and Steve into a fighting ring, and they tie Steve, and make Garrett fight against a chicken jockey. Meanwhile, Henry finally found the crystal orb, but an enderman happens to be behind him, he tries closing his eyes, but in one moment Garrett looks at the enderman, and the enderman gives him a brutal blackpill hallucination which makes him see the people he knows telling him how worthless he is, the hallucination passes fast, and the enderman attacks him, but Henry manages to kill the enderman and get and ender pearl. He then breaks a block on the floor, and gets to where Steve and Garrett are fighting against the chicken jockey. They manage to beat the chicken jockey, and they escape the illagers leaving the woodland mansion.
While Henry, Steve, and Garrett were leaving the woodland mansion, they get attacked by the piglins and ghasts who destroy the bridge where they were running in. Malgosha with her powers steals the orb with the crystal from them, and goes away leaving her piglins and ghasts attacking them. Henry and Steve escape by getting into a platform being carried by a ghast, but Garrett stays distracting the piglins, and making them blow up with him on the bridge. Henry and Steve while flying with the ghasts get attacked, and they fall to the ground unconscious. Meanwhile, the foids Natalie and Dawn are running around killing zombies, and they find Dennis who guides them to Steve. Natalie and Dawn take Henry and Steve to a safe place on a mushroom house where Henry and Steve wake up.
Meanwhile, Malgosha takes over the overworld with a huge Nether portal and the orb which causes for the overworld to turn dark, and all monsters start attacking. Henry, Steve, Natalie, and Dawn organize their plan to defeat Malgosha and her piglins. They craft multiple iron golems, and they make a giant fast golem out of iron blocks and swiftness boots. The piglins attack the golems, and the golems start defending themselves. Dawn tames multiple dogs and explodes TNT to fight against monsters. Henry throws his ender pearl at the high point of the huge Nether portal where the orb is placed, but he fails to pick it up because he's short. A piglin shoots at Henry, and he ends up falling from a high place, but Garret appears out of nowhere controling a Ghast and he saves Henry from his fall. Steve then fights against Malgosha with his diamond armor, but his diamond chestplate gets broken. The orb gets removed from the high place, and the giant piglin grabs it, but the fast giant iron golem takes the orb away from him, and destroys the giant piglin. The dark suddenly disappears, and it's day again. Steve manages to defeat Malgosha, and Steve leaves Malgosha to agonize.
We then get the ending where Henry, Steve, Garrett, Natalie, Dawn, and Dennis go back to the real world once the portal is open, and there their lives become better. Garrett makes a videogame out of what they experienced in Minecraft and his finances recover, Dawn has her business working with animals, and Natalie creates self-defense classes using models of piglins. The movie then ends with them singing and dancing with multiple people at the game shop.
The credits play, and we see the nitwit villager with the oldass foid viceprincipal Marlene, they went on a date after she hit him with her car, and this part is so cringe on the movie. Marlene's ex-husband is Henry's art teacher, and he gets cucked by the nitwit villager who proposes marriage to this foid. The villager learned to speak English, and the foid learned to speak the villager's mumbling language.
On the post-credits scene, we get to see Steve going back to his home, and there he meets the new homeowner who is Alex, but we don't see Alex's face, only her back red hair. The voice of the foid who plays Alex was hot ngl.
And this is all the Minecraft movie.
Now my review:
The movie was mid, I thought it was gonna be something woke because of the nigger foids appearing, and because it's a movie directed by a kike, but I did become entertained by the movie. I forgot about my blackpilled life watching the movie. I liked the adventure they made on the movie, all the Minecraft references, the pink sheep was kind of weird on its design and sounds(also creepy scene on the movie: the pink sheep gets devoured by zombies, no joke). The explosions were epic, and the fight against Malgosha and the piglins was amazing too. One thing I did cringe to was the the oldass foid dating the villager, why do they have to add these cringe scenes? Just for this, I give the movie 3.5 stars.
