I have had this behavior since I was a child, however, when I was little the attacks were more directed at my father, and justified, in my opinion.
Yesterday I attacked again, I remember, I'm realizing now that I really did something, which leaves me a little confused, my mother knows that... However, I think she avoids telling me, but I remember, I was hitting the fridge and then I took a knife, I thought it was a dream like the previous ones, however, today I went to the fridge and saw a sunken shape. Man, I don't control this shit.
It's like it's an evil part of me that I avoid, but when I hold it back long enough it comes back and doesn't communicate with me. I have no desire to do harm or anything like that, obviously, I have tendencies, just like anyone else, but they are trivial things, like swearing due to the impulse of anger I have from time to time. But I have no desire to do real evil.
Analyzing myself, I realize that I'm a big genetic trash with a fucked up childhood, insisting on that isn't my thing, but it seems that emanations from me have remained marked.
This is not mystical at all, so avoid looking with a broad esoteric gaze, this is just a being, a truecel being.
Yesterday I attacked again, I remember, I'm realizing now that I really did something, which leaves me a little confused, my mother knows that... However, I think she avoids telling me, but I remember, I was hitting the fridge and then I took a knife, I thought it was a dream like the previous ones, however, today I went to the fridge and saw a sunken shape. Man, I don't control this shit.
It's like it's an evil part of me that I avoid, but when I hold it back long enough it comes back and doesn't communicate with me. I have no desire to do harm or anything like that, obviously, I have tendencies, just like anyone else, but they are trivial things, like swearing due to the impulse of anger I have from time to time. But I have no desire to do real evil.
Analyzing myself, I realize that I'm a big genetic trash with a fucked up childhood, insisting on that isn't my thing, but it seems that emanations from me have remained marked.
This is not mystical at all, so avoid looking with a broad esoteric gaze, this is just a being, a truecel being.
