Was waiting for the train today like a poor wageslave and across me were two kids, a boy and a girl (obviously), I guess around 12 or so.
And while I mostly minded my own business at some point I made the brutal mistake of looking up, only to notice that the girl was writing something on the boy's hand.
It's nothing much, perhaps, but in that very instant I was overcome by memories of girls in my school doing this same thing to the boys in class, presumably the ones they liked. I distinctly remember the pressing loneliness I felt way back in these days for being left out in this process.
This invaluable and innocent bliss known as teenage love! I have missed out on it all. And here, across me, is this kid, less than half my age, going through these very first stages of exploration. A year from now, he'll receive his first kiss; the year after, he and his virgin girlfriend innocently explore each others' bodies in a moment of pure, innocent ecstacy.
God, why not me?
And while I mostly minded my own business at some point I made the brutal mistake of looking up, only to notice that the girl was writing something on the boy's hand.
It's nothing much, perhaps, but in that very instant I was overcome by memories of girls in my school doing this same thing to the boys in class, presumably the ones they liked. I distinctly remember the pressing loneliness I felt way back in these days for being left out in this process.
This invaluable and innocent bliss known as teenage love! I have missed out on it all. And here, across me, is this kid, less than half my age, going through these very first stages of exploration. A year from now, he'll receive his first kiss; the year after, he and his virgin girlfriend innocently explore each others' bodies in a moment of pure, innocent ecstacy.
God, why not me?
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