It's Over Every good moment of my life is fading

[Deleted member 7573]

These are the last moments of my life that good and simple things will still bring me a little pleasure, everything is collapsing, there is no hope anymore, good moments from a distant past only disintegrate and new ones have never been an option for me, I would like to return at those times when I was judged differently when I was considered a misfit boy and not a monster that deserves to be isolated and tortured.

Today on my way home I realized that the weather was exactly the way I thought it was perfect when I was a child, a blue sky day with sunlight all the time, but a cool breeze to make you move or you would need a jacket, this was the perfect weather to spend all afternoon on the street with the first and last friends I had, and for a second a mere fucking second I felt alive again, as if I were there again but immediatly as it began, it ended and I returned to my reality of rot and loneliness.

How much more of these memories are going to disappear and the pleasure of remembering them last less and less? What will be the meaning when everything that made me feel that I was human disappear? Why did I end up in this situation?

And worse why do people think this is justifiable? All I see they say is that someone like us deserves it, if they think it's justifiable to lose everything that someday made you human, maybe I should not treat them like one too, if they see me as a plague that needs to be exterminated maybe I should exterminate them first, because isn't that the role of a monstrous plague?

 

[Zesto]

I would like to return at those times when I was judged differently when I was considered a misfit boy

Yes I infuse my face with Vit C serum so I remain a boy for as long as I can.

I just did my infusion and it smells really nice.

I consider myself an innocent boy that just wants to be loved (because that's what I am). https://incels.is/threads/boymaxxing.83498/

I am hoping to find a mommygf to love me and treat me like the boy I am.

 

[Deleted member 7573]

Yes I infuse my face with Vit C serum so I remain a boy for as long as I can.

I just did my infusion and it smells really nice.

I consider myself an innocent boy that just wants to be loved (because that's what I am). https://incels.is/threads/boymaxxing.83498/

I am hoping to find a mommygf to love me and treat me like the boy I am.

This is a great idea, but it won't work when everyone know your true age, when you go to japan you will need to lie to them, don't ever say your true age, society hate people like us but they will be more tolerant if we are young.

 

[Handflappingcel]

I would like to return at those times when I was judged differently when I was considered a misfit boy and not a monster that deserves to be isolated and tortured.

The smell of grass in the morning makes gets me bad Its connected with experiences that seem from another dimension and world. Things some cant imagine.​

 

[Zesto]

This is a great idea, but it won't work when everyone know your true age, when you go to japan you will need to lie to them, don't ever say your true age, society hate people like us but they will be more tolerant if we are young.

Whatever it takes for people like us.

I will lie and tell them I'm half Japanese as well.

It's a doggy dogg world.

 

[StaroRavager]

My fond memories are fleeting too and in some cases they make me feel more hopeless given how I’ll never be able to return to those times

 

[Rice Cel]

Suicide fuel

 

[ChronicPaincel]

day and night my life is a nightmare.

 

[Deleted member 5712]

once your life is turned to such shit and you see no way out it is very easy to turn to wrong think/bad think
hurting people seems justifiable then
and many other things

 

[Animas]

wow dude i teared up a bit i really relate i hate it when it’s a beautiful day outside and I feel like that could be one of the greatest days of my life - “could be” cuz then i remember how miserable i am and how this nice day could’ve been an incredible memory and yet it’s just another day come gone and wasted

 

[The End]

And worse why do people think this is justifiable? All I see they say is that someone like us deserves it,

Because people desperately want to believe the world they live in is fair. If they admit how shaky the roles we play are, they can no longer take credit for their achievements or feel a sense of control. A huge chunk of their worldview and sense of self and safety would immediately crumble.

It's one of the greatest examples of cognitive dissonance.

Oh, and I'm middle-aged; life gets progressively duller and less enjoyable. I think this happens to all people. When do you ever see 40 year-olds legitimately excited?

 

[Deleted member 60]

This thread hits me hard OP.

this is heavy tbh

 

[Deleted member 14490]

Haven't had any good moments for a very long time.

 

[BrutusWarmus]

Because people desperately want to believe the world they live in is fair. If they admit how shaky the roles we play are, they can no longer take credit for their achievements or feel a sense of control. A huge chunk of their worldview and sense of self and safety would immediately crumble.

It's one of the greatest examples of cognitive dissonance.

Oh, and I'm middle-aged; life gets progressively duller and less enjoyable. I think this happens to all people. When do you ever see 40 year-olds legitimately excited?

So if you life is already dull at early 20's, its only down from here? Yikes

 

[FlyFace]

if they see me as a plague that needs to be exterminated maybe I should exterminate them first, because isn't that the role of a monstrous plague?

I like this quote.

Yeah, I've always looked how I look.. everybody avoided me back in High School and everyone avoids or ignores me now.. really hurts you deep down when people won't even look at you.. to me it is like the bullying never ceased. I am still that horrific drooling boz eyed retarded faggot that couldn't speak properly I was back then, back to the wall constantly with no one to turn to, pushed to and fro in the halls, tripped constantly, my bag being vandalised, things constantly being thrown at me.. I just wanted to be human, but no, can't let ugly people exist without their lives being extremely difficult, I mean how could they fraudulently that the Just World theory exists, even though they have bullied people in the past and they have selective amnesia when they bully other people and the effect on the victims it has.. people will never perceive me as anything other than a creature devoid of humanity. I would laugh if the Black Death came back, purposefully get infected and start running everywhere and spreading it to everyone, which is why I like that quote. I would become a living and breathing plague just to get back at everything.

 

[Insomniac]

This hit me really hard. I can relate.

While we’re living the dreams we had as children fade away.

 

[micropenis29]

Yes I infuse my face with Vit C serum so I remain a boy for as long as I can.

I just did my infusion and it smells really nice.

I consider myself an innocent boy that just wants to be loved (because that's what I am). https://incels.is/threads/boymaxxing.83498/

I am hoping to find a mommygf to love me and treat me like the boy I am.

Do you have any reason to believe this "mommygf" thing will work?

 

[Zesto]

Do you have any reason to believe this "mommygf" thing will work?

I think with a Japanese woman slightly older than me I can pull it off after fully J-PopIdolBoyMaxxing.

 

[♥HonestlyEndMe♥]

what are these "good moments" you speak of

 

[Mainländer]

There are no second chances in life. Sometimes not even first chances.

 

[Deleted member 7573]

what are these "good moments" you speak of

One that I remember a little bit now but thinking well was one of the best I shared with my only friends, we used to go up in the late afternoon in an unfinished construction of a school that we had in our region, we only went there on the weekend, since there was no class there these days, we would sit there talking shit to each other, laughing and being children, every now and then we would stop and look around because you could see all the city and the buildings of the central part, we were there in the late afternoon, with the orange sun and the sky in blue and red, we stayed there until it gets dark with the points of light of the buildings windows and the plates of neon from the advertisements, every time I see the lights of the buildings in a distant landscape I remember little more of what it was like, but the feeling is now much more distant, it's just gotten further away from me.

 

[Ritalincel]

try wellbutrin