SuicideFuel Even when I apply myself to something, I still feel lost and empty

[Celius]

My brain keeps coming up with these crazy fucking tactics of trying to cope by alarming me that maybe the cause of all my current problems is because I’m “wasting” my life away and I’m not putting it into any good use.

Well guess what? Even I’m trying to do that, I feel just as miserable as when I’m NEETing or putting zero effort into learning anything.

I can never wrap my head around how normies get away with this. This is their way of coping, I guess. They keep forcing themselves to believe that all their anguish is due to being unproductive when in actuality, they lack sufficient levels of self-image required to even understand where their source of anger and/or hatred is coming from. They can’t find the root of their problems, they can only bother tackling the surface level. They wanna make it so that it looks like they have everything under control.

But none of it matters for them anyway when they’re normal looking enough to be given a sex life. You can do anything and everything and as long as you’re lonely and abnormal, it will all feel meaningless.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

Absence of external input is needed, in my case though.

 

[Jedi Master Cock ru]

But none of it matters for them anyway when they’re normal looking enough to be given a sex life.

Like you're saying I think, normies don't even need to bother with these kinds of questions or internal conflicts because of the sense of value and meaning being in a sexual relationship and having been desired and treated as normal their whole lives has bestowed to them... It's almost like an equivalent or easy answer to the search for meaning we go through. Meanwhile we struggle for meaning and need to go through all this suffering and on this lifelong journey that seems to lead to nowhere to find it. Maybe there is no meaning to be found other than a strong relationship and/or a family? Or maybe some of us are lucky enough to have that meaning outside of a relationship/family... Interestingly enough they probably don't end up on this forum.

I think I also struggle with the thought that I'm wasting my life on meaningless pursuits or "the wrong" pursuit, and that oftentimes it has this paralyzing effect that makes me want to just stay in place. I do feel very restless though when this happens (often).

 

[Celius]

Like you're saying I think, normies don't even need to bother with these kinds of questions or internal conflicts because of the sense of value and meaning being in a sexual relationship and having been desired and treated as normal their whole lives has bestowed to them...

Absolutely, beyond the shadow of a doubt. I’d like to also think that their line of reasoning and overall philosophical beliefs is very much on par with the ones of a child purely because of the lack of any internal conflict. Suffering yields evolving, they’d never elapsed a time period in their life where they had to contemplate and seek out a why as opposed to an incel going through years and years of solitude and desolation, trying to find meaning in suffering.

Maybe there is no meaning to be found other than a strong relationship and/or a family?

There absolutely isn’t. The way I’ve always perceived it is comparing a human being with river water. A river water is meant to flow as harmonious as possible until it inevitably evaporates, then condenses and finally falls back into the river. The “flow” for a human being is achieving milestones of which determine his goals and ambitions; a strong relationship and/or a family is one of, if not, the most important one. If all goes well, you’ll eventually embark on the same pathway your ancestors did for as long as mankind can remember but if not, then there will be suffering, confusion, agony, and hatred. Lots and lots of hatred.

 

[eldercelder]

Like you're saying I think, normies don't even need to bother with these kinds of questions or internal conflicts because of the sense of value and meaning being in a sexual relationship and having been desired and treated as normal their whole lives has bestowed to them...

I agree. Or, at the very least, normies can distract themselves from having to think about these things because of the validation they get from having successful social-sexual lives. It's easy to let it roll off your back if something GOOD is guaranteed to come your way. Without this, all you can do is stew in your own misery without any positives to negate the bad.