RageFuel Do any of you feel insecure about a dirty/ shitty house?

[Pinpoint]

I went to my old house today in my good car and I realize the difference between what I was today vs 5 years ago when I lived out on my own. I am 24 now and I got infuriated form living in filth.
But I realized I had a toyota RSX 2019, and I am proud of it and thenwalk in and then feel obkectified as being a fat slob because my family lives that way.
I get infuriated by the notion of being low value. From something of fineness to shittiness.

I remember my dad beat up my mother for not doing the dishes. It's because he thinks he is of low value out there, constnatly comapring himself to others (because he knows the real blackpills of life subconsciously, but doesn't have hte other conviction qualities to say it/ make it conscious, so they're just vague feelings, so the voidpill, not a soli dblackpill).
And I harken back to the times when I was paralyzed when people could see the way my shit looks. They will associate everything baout me to low primal value/ status/ refinement. And they will associate me with a lowborn/ low value person.
Genetics can take the cake. Sure. But I want to be refined ine very case, and I need to be in order for my plan to work.
People who think it's all about genetics are talking about people who look like fucking supermodels. But I would be substantially attractive enough if I were associated with high value.
Women are primal creatures but eventually everyone wakes up and beigns to analyze your value objectively... and then it synthesizes where people will judge you for what momentum/ incline your life takes. And if you live like a slob you will be associated as a slob... even chad, or chad-lite. And that won't get you all that far.
Being high quality genetically/ gigachad tier is rare. But you can be of value as chad lite.
But even if I were gigachad I would feel like a slob. It's just that the less gigachad you are the more vulnerable you are, and the more other veins of value like status, money, demeanor are to you. Hell, that's why pick up artistry is a thing.

 

[Deleted member 15752]

To a extent yes, but who really comes around to see me?

 

[Pinpoint]

To a extent yes, but who really comes around to see me?

that's what I thought when I lived on my own.
My dad is not able to divorce himself for his need for vanity like that though lol. It must be constant always.
His presentability. But now I've learned how to call upon those inner criticisms whenever I want to.

 

[Deleted member 15752]

that's what I thought when I lived on my own.
My dad is not able to divorce himself for his need for vanity like that though lol. It must be constant always.
His presentability. But now I've learned how to call upon those inner criticisms whenever I want to.

I understand where you are coming from.

 

[Pinpoint]

I understand where you are coming from.

Took intellectualization and realizing htat inner criticism is a tool/ feeling for survival, and shoudl be appleid to when it is a proper resource/ substance at a certain situation.
But my mom driving from place to place, dad expecting high, and getting low and him needing compensate with something highly presentbale like a house, and then blaming us is something I kind of inherited. Which is why I had to leave and couldn't be NEET for very long somewhere I hated.

 

[Michael15651]

It's more of the value of my house. I used to live in one of the richest neighborhoods in the area and still got embarrassed to walk near it because I know there are people in the upper-class who have it better.

 

[Pinpoint]

It's more of the value of my house. I used to live in one of the richest neighborhoods in the area and still got embarrassed to walk near it because I know there are people in the upper-class who have it better.

That's partially true. But in my opinion even having something remarkable where you are high value, with a 700k house I had (which isn't extremely great but good) would be a fun platform to start from. But when you don't really have that because of fat slobs (that my dad couldn't fix, and so my mom divorced him because of the abuse) then you don't even feel you have any grounding to start. And you don't wanna be a loser, and perform high... and then fail people's primal criteria when you bring a good looking girl to your house.
And then when you don't even have social-lifing on the menu as a kid then what the fuck are you gonna be motivated by.
A lot of everything, unless you're gigachad (which means people will open their houses to you) is dependent on your hard work to make it.
Where you will always have to be a supporter of your qualifier off of a system of yourself rather than to be someone who people want in their system automatically without any extrinsic material/ resource gathering.
The trip to be chad would be trepidatious for me but I would need a lot of extraneous resources to make me the object of complete desire.
And I would need more and more to solidify my value.
People are not conscientiously aware of the blackpill. They can feel high resources from me, without genetics just shotuing out my value. They won't be comparing me to chad. I would have been high tier, and only those iwth the insight of the power of chad would stand against me. But even then, my value would have been unquestionable with the wealth of my value, along with everything else.