[Cope Thread] Hedonic Treamill and Absurdism

[IdealMaxilla]

[font=Roboto, arial, sans-serif]The hedonic treadmill, also known as hedonic adaptation, is the observed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes.[/font]

People with poor mental adaptation often cope that if things were just a 'little bit different' you would be happy. So you project happiness onto concepts like Stacy and Chad. Well, what if I told you that you are unhappy because you are unhappy and Stacy and Chad are just poor coping strategies?

Thats the hedonic treadmill, even if you were balls deep right now after a short period of time you would go right back to the same level of misery, and like a drug addict maybe even lower. 

Whether you admit or not everyone's life is more or less meaningless, you breathe, you drink, you eat, you shit, you die.

You are just like Sysiphus trying to push the stone to the top on the mountain 

http://dbanach.com/sisyphus.htm

The meaning and the value of your own life is all in your head

 

[kodoku]

I just want sex weekly with my gf

 

[blickpall]

This is absolutely true, powerful, and proven in many studies. The only exception is that when people suffer a tremendous loss, say a person gets hit by a car and becomes a paraplegic, their happiness does rise over time but it never reaches the same midpoint. There are of course some obstacles in studies of this nature, but the result is both expected and consistent.

The surprising part is what the OP mentions; even if you won the lottery right now, in ~1 year you will be the same level of happy as you are right now.

 

[NekoStance]

It's part truth part cope

combine this with Maslow Pyramid and you get better idea

 

[jagged0]

Someone give this man a reward for this amazing post!

 

[IdealMaxilla]

It's part truth part cope

combine this with Maslow Pyramid and you get better idea

Maslow studied only the top 1% and the pyramid is based on that. That's a poor cope

 

[blickpall]

Maslow studied only the top 1% and the pyramid is based on that. That's a poor cope

To add to this, Maslow's pyramid has been adapted, changed, and revised by many psychologists since then, and in all of these iterations there has been the admission that one does not necessarily need everything on the bottom-most tier to yearn for, strive for, or achieve something on the higher tiers (except the top-most, in some cases).

 

[theson]

People with poor mental adaptation often cope that if things were just a 'little bit different' you would be happy. So you project happiness onto concepts like Stacy and Chad. Well, what if I told you that you are unhappy because you are unhappy and Stacy and Chad are just poor coping strategies?

Thats the hedonic treadmill, even if you were balls deep right now after a short period of time you would go right back to the same level of misery, and like a drug addict maybe even lower. 

Whether you admit or not everyone's life is more or less meaningless, you breathe, you drink, you eat, you shit, you die.

You are just like Sysiphus trying to push the stone to the top on the mountain 

http://dbanach.com/sisyphus.htm

The meaning and the value of your own life is all in your head

I don't claim that I will never have problems and be perfectly happy if I have a girlfriend/wife/friends/family. I have ambitions outside of that. However, no matter what kind of shit life throws at you, it's never going to be quite as bad when you don't have to go it alone. When I have no one to love me and no one to share my life with, I have no ambition to live. What is the point of anything when you're alone in the world?

 

[IdealMaxilla]

I don't claim that I will never have problems and be perfectly happy if I have a girlfriend/wife/friends/family. I have ambitions outside of that. However, no matter what kind of shit life throws at you, it's never going to be quite as bad when you don't have to go it alone. When I have no one to love me and no one to share my life with, I have no ambition to live. What is the point of anything when you're alone in the world?

Everyone is born alone and dies alone, you MUST cope with being alone. There is no way around this. 

You are clearly projecting your happiness onto others as I mentioned in the OP. 

And in addition to all that, no women wants a needy man who feels that he requires her to make himself whole. You will just get crushed for being so vulnerable. Women want a hunter, an independent male who can make it on his own but chooses to include her in his life.

 

[theson]

Women want a hunter, an independent male who can make it on his own but chooses to include her in his life.

Women want a guy who looks masculine. I look like a little kid with girl arms. Incidentally, my looks make me unable to assume a dominant role because I am simply not dominant in any social hierarchy. Other men pick on me and dominate me because they see that I am small and pathetic. But that's besides the point. Even if I was a delusional wannabe alpha male, I'd still get no pussy because I simply don't look the part.

 

[IdealMaxilla]

Women want a guy who looks masculine. I look like a little kid with girl arms. Incidentally, my looks make me unable to assume a dominant role because I am simply not dominant in any social hierarchy. Other men pick on me and dominate me because they see that I am small and pathetic. But that's besides the point. Even if I was a delusional wannabe alpha male, I'd still get no pussy because I simply don't look the part.

so ldar or just become an independent single adult male. seems to me millions of men have no problem coping with it. learn from them the ways of good cope. stopping shitty copes like muh chad muh alpha seems like a good starting point

 

[A Good Friend]

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81zQr-zr98k[/video]


informative if you're unfamiliar with these topics, boring if not.

also, this asshole needs to turn his mic up.