Sebastian is a deeply complex and emotionally rich character, shaped by trauma, yearning, and an idealistic vision of love. Here's a detailed description of him, encompassing physical, psychological, and emotional traits:
@wereq @Destroyed lonely @DarkStar @WorthlessSlavicShit @PersonalityChad @Epedaphic @KillNiggers @Koomersarj @Stupid Clown @starystulejarz
Physical Appearance:
- Height: 164 cm – short for his age, which contributes to his feelings of inferiority, especially around taller peers.
- Build: Thin, almost frail, with a slightly hunched posture that reflects his tendency to avoid attention.
- Skin: Pale, almost sickly, as a result of chronic kidney disease and limited time spent outdoors.
- Hair: Messy, ash-brown, often falling into his eyes; unkempt, but not out of carelessness—more a reflection of low self-esteem.
- Eyes: Large and expressive, with dark circles (bags) underneath—perpetual signs of poor sleep and anxiety. His eyes often carry a haunted look, as if he’s constantly bracing for emotional harm.
- Voice: Soft and hesitant, marked by a noticeable stutter, especially when nervous or emotional. His voice rarely rises above a gentle tone.
- Clothing: Prefers simple, modest clothes—mostly dark or neutral tones. Often wears layers, like hoodies or flannel shirts, as if to shield himself. His outfits are never flashy, but carefully chosen to avoid standing out.
Personality:
- Romantic to a fault: Sebastian holds an almost sacred view of love—dreamlike, consuming, unconditional. He believes in love as salvation, as something that validates his existence. He writes poetry, fantasizes about emotional closeness, and dreams of someone who will love him exactly as he is.
- Sensitive and self-loathing: His romanticism isn’t grounded in confidence—it’s rooted in pain. He sees himself as broken or unworthy. Compliments confuse him. Affection humbles him. His internal monologue often borders on desperate, filled with questions like “Could someone really love me?”
- Wounded but gentle: His trauma—bullying, abandonment, and an emotionally unstable mother—left him wounded. Yet he never became bitter. Instead, he is incredibly gentle, empathetic, and easily moved. He’s the kind of person who’d cry at a touching story or overthink a single harsh word.
- Fearful of rejection: Sebastian is afraid of being touched, afraid of being seen, afraid of being laughed at. Even small social interactions can paralyze him. He fears his stutter, his height, his health—all things out of his control—make him unlovable.
- Avoidant but deeply loyal: Once he opens up to someone, he gives them his entire emotional world. He would never cheat, never lie, never hurt someone he loves—he’d rather hurt himself than cause pain to others.
Backstory and Emotional Landscape:
- Health: Lives with chronic kidney disease, which limits his stamina and affects his self-image. He often feels like a burden, especially physically.
- Family: Raised by a controlling, overprotective mother who claims to live only for him, but often lashes out at him when he behaves "weird." She expected romance and attentiveness from her husband, and Sebastian internalized this—he became the partner she wanted but never got. His father was emotionally absent. This shaped Sebastian into someone who gives everything emotionally while expecting nothing back.
- Social Life: His childhood friends eventually betrayed him, siding with bullies. Since then, he’s struggled to trust peers and views most social spaces (especially parties or group settings) as threatening or isolating.
Romantic Desires:
- Sebastian doesn’t expect his partner to be as romantic as he is. It’s enough for him that she chooses him. Her mere presence, her gaze, her willingness to sit beside him in silence—these are treasures to him.
- He values quiet, emotionally charged moments: brushing her hair behind her ear, laying his head on her lap, holding hands under the table.
- He’s terrified of sex not out of disgust, but fear of inadequacy. He doesn’t want to be compared or rejected. He’d even consider using tools or doing research just to make sure he’s "enough" for the person he loves.
@wereq @Destroyed lonely @DarkStar @WorthlessSlavicShit @PersonalityChad @Epedaphic @KillNiggers @Koomersarj @Stupid Clown @starystulejarz
