I've always been an outsider and felt weird since i was born. My whole family is white and i'm mixed so i've dissociated from them my entire life. Felt good to have no burden to talking and being around them for a while but it got old. Plus i got to work on myself and figure out my passion that takes most people until their 30's to late 40's.
Same here, I have a White family and a Jewish Black Latino (Zambo) family, I deliberately associate myself with Asian culture because I have been dismissed by both groups growing up, I was also "too nerdy" for the Nigs, if you live in Europe not being White automatically makes you "a foreigner" even if your ancestors have lived there as long as the rest and carry a Germanic Y chromosome, you're just not "one of us".
I remember very well when I was 10~12 visiting a Colombian relative of mine and playing with her sons and three distant female cousins of ours and the girls all praying that we shared absolutely no relationship because I was "weird" and "goofy", it's something that has stayed with me all my life.
To strangers I look "Egyptian" so if someone asks me where I'm from I will commonly claim to be a Copt just to disassociate myself from my family. Being mixed means that you don't belong in either world.
Also, Foids have
very strong in-group biases so if they can't place you in their in-group you are bannished to their out-group and unless you're an ethnic Chad you're sub-human to most. I don't keep to myself because I want to, I keep to myself because I'm always "the outsider". I just don't talk to any family members of mine at all, even those that welcome me view me as an outsider. When my father died I lost contact with my White family and to my mother's family I'm "a Black Makamba" (Makamba = White Monkey, how they refer to White Dutch people but is never seen as racist when they call us this).
I'm not saying that I'm alone solely because of my race, I have a cousin who's a Chandlet lawyer that found another Mulatta, another cousin also married a Mulatta with a White father and literally walking stereotype Black mother (even in daishiki with Chiquita Banana hat), but they simply aren't as ugly as I am. I think that my ugliness is why everyone always rejects me.