Bob was a simple man and had a very normal and well-rounded life. He was rather quiet and didn't engage in much conversation with others, this was primarily out of a paralysing fear that at some point during a social interaction he may accidentally say the dreaded n-word.
One day Bob had finally had enough. He would set out on a journey so great, so heroic that he would be granted a lifetime of applause and fame. He left his garbage apartment that was rotting down more than the local dump and proceeded to head to the airport. The prior night Bob had booked a flight to Washington D.C just before he crawled into bed. Bearing in mind this was November of 2011 (I think we all know where this is going) Obama was in office as president of the United States of America, a rather modest title if I do say so myself.
After an evening of travel, Bob decided to book a stay at the local motel, considering he was flat broke this was probably his only bloody option. Bob walks up the disgusting, ransid and shit-stained stairs to his room. Upon reaching his room he noticed something strange, really strange. He rushed back down the stairs like a lightening bolt and ran through the double doors with great force into the parking lot. He continues running for 10 more seconds until he was almost out of breath. There, right there, he has reached it. So glorious. A blind homeless man begging for change. Bob knows how to react instantly, he grabs the change from the homeless man's pocket and sprints away. At one point he almost slipped as he desperately fled like a clumsy gazzel from the scene. After reaching his room again he looks in his hand, perplexed Bob leans in for a closer look. That wasn't change, it was heart medication pills. Bob laughs it off and throws the pills into a corner of the hallway.
Bob entered his room, the door creeked so badly that he had Vietnam flashbacks, those damn chinks he said abruptly. After a quick cup of freshly plucked toenails to fill his belly he lay his head to rest.
The next day Bob woke with a fright, it appeared that the window to his room had been blown right off its hinges. This intrigued Bob and as such he went to investigate. He lept out of bed with a grasshopper-like stride and flew several feet across the shadowy, gloomy floor of the motel bedroom. He skidded to a wrething halt just before reaching the window. Upon looking out Bob discovered with a slight shock that the US military had surrounded the building and had fired a NATO anti-tank round straight through his window glass which was what had caused it to shatter. Almost immediately a screaching sound echoed throughout the barren parking lot so loud that the shock waves could've overturned a car. A voice began to shout in an angry manner "Mr Bobby, please surrender immediatley, failure to comply will result in you being shot". Bob cringed at the thought of it, after slight hesitation Bob decided he was not having any of it. He reached into his back pocket and felt around, past the pocket lint and old chewing gum packet, he proceeded to pull out a suicide belt strapped with bombs and run into the troops, after detonation his body was shredded into a hundred pieces of human flesh. He never was able to call Obama a nig... (This communication has been interrupted by the Obama administration of national affairs).
One day Bob had finally had enough. He would set out on a journey so great, so heroic that he would be granted a lifetime of applause and fame. He left his garbage apartment that was rotting down more than the local dump and proceeded to head to the airport. The prior night Bob had booked a flight to Washington D.C just before he crawled into bed. Bearing in mind this was November of 2011 (I think we all know where this is going) Obama was in office as president of the United States of America, a rather modest title if I do say so myself.
After an evening of travel, Bob decided to book a stay at the local motel, considering he was flat broke this was probably his only bloody option. Bob walks up the disgusting, ransid and shit-stained stairs to his room. Upon reaching his room he noticed something strange, really strange. He rushed back down the stairs like a lightening bolt and ran through the double doors with great force into the parking lot. He continues running for 10 more seconds until he was almost out of breath. There, right there, he has reached it. So glorious. A blind homeless man begging for change. Bob knows how to react instantly, he grabs the change from the homeless man's pocket and sprints away. At one point he almost slipped as he desperately fled like a clumsy gazzel from the scene. After reaching his room again he looks in his hand, perplexed Bob leans in for a closer look. That wasn't change, it was heart medication pills. Bob laughs it off and throws the pills into a corner of the hallway.
Bob entered his room, the door creeked so badly that he had Vietnam flashbacks, those damn chinks he said abruptly. After a quick cup of freshly plucked toenails to fill his belly he lay his head to rest.
The next day Bob woke with a fright, it appeared that the window to his room had been blown right off its hinges. This intrigued Bob and as such he went to investigate. He lept out of bed with a grasshopper-like stride and flew several feet across the shadowy, gloomy floor of the motel bedroom. He skidded to a wrething halt just before reaching the window. Upon looking out Bob discovered with a slight shock that the US military had surrounded the building and had fired a NATO anti-tank round straight through his window glass which was what had caused it to shatter. Almost immediately a screaching sound echoed throughout the barren parking lot so loud that the shock waves could've overturned a car. A voice began to shout in an angry manner "Mr Bobby, please surrender immediatley, failure to comply will result in you being shot". Bob cringed at the thought of it, after slight hesitation Bob decided he was not having any of it. He reached into his back pocket and felt around, past the pocket lint and old chewing gum packet, he proceeded to pull out a suicide belt strapped with bombs and run into the troops, after detonation his body was shredded into a hundred pieces of human flesh. He never was able to call Obama a nig... (This communication has been interrupted by the Obama administration of national affairs).
