I guess that makes sense, but it hit me so hard. People from my uni don't even want to talk to me, they've been ignoring me since the day 1 and not inviting me to any integration meetings, so I have no idea what their lives are like. She didn't brag or anything, she was casually talking with the teacher about corona because the class hadn't started yet and she said something about her fiance with whom she lives getting in contact with someone who has corona. Not a bf, a fiance.
While I'm still waiting for my first sleepover, fuck it, my first hug from someone outside my family (I may have received some as a toddler or something, but none in the years I can remember), foids my age are getting engaged and married. Holy fuck, I just realized some foids in my group may be married or, who knows, even have children, I'm the age when that should happen. Canada literally considers me a terrorist for complaining about my loneliness and apparently I'm not entitled to having people treat me with any respect and not outright ignoring me when I ask for their names in attempt to make friends. Meanwhile foids my age with similar interests and mental capacities live out lives like in movies. While I wallow in misery and struggle to get my homework done due to overwhelming depression, they just call their bf or a fucking FIANCE to get their fix of socialization. While I try to satiate my brain's need for human interaction by chatting with strangers online, they just call their friends and organize a sleepover. Heaven and hell.
But of course it's them who are persecuted (how?) and because of that they receive support from my uni: internship programmas but only for foids, stipend programmas but only for foids! Damn, I guess I should just contemplate my privilege, sitting alone in my small room, staring at the screen which is the only source of entertainment for me.
While I'm still waiting for my first sleepover, fuck it, my first hug from someone outside my family (I may have received some as a toddler or something, but none in the years I can remember), foids my age are getting engaged and married. Holy fuck, I just realized some foids in my group may be married or, who knows, even have children, I'm the age when that should happen. Canada literally considers me a terrorist for complaining about my loneliness and apparently I'm not entitled to having people treat me with any respect and not outright ignoring me when I ask for their names in attempt to make friends. Meanwhile foids my age with similar interests and mental capacities live out lives like in movies. While I wallow in misery and struggle to get my homework done due to overwhelming depression, they just call their bf or a fucking FIANCE to get their fix of socialization. While I try to satiate my brain's need for human interaction by chatting with strangers online, they just call their friends and organize a sleepover. Heaven and hell.
But of course it's them who are persecuted (how?) and because of that they receive support from my uni: internship programmas but only for foids, stipend programmas but only for foids! Damn, I guess I should just contemplate my privilege, sitting alone in my small room, staring at the screen which is the only source of entertainment for me.
